The Proverbs 31 Woman and Social Media

"She is clothed in strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come. She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue."

           -Proverbs 31:25-26

If you're a woman, you've read or heard this verse before.


It's plastered on motivational posters at women's conferences.
It's written on our prayer journals.
It's the caption of your Facebook photo.
You hang it around your neck and buy t-shirts with it drawn in a fancy feminine script on the front.


It's easy to wear.
It's simple to read.
But, is it as simple to understand and to LIVE out loud?


I know, I know, parts of the verse don't seem to apply to us anymore in 2014.
Nobody "dresses her family in scarlet" anymore.
But, I believe there is still a real, relevant message contained within this snippet of scripture that we can apply to a modern part of life.


Social media.


It's great to strive to achieve proverbs 31 status by respecting your spouse, loving your children and providing a nurturing/hard-working presence within the walls of your own home.
But, are we neglecting one of the largest influences that we have on others as Christian women?


Let's break a part the snapshot of the verse above and ask ourselves individually if we are truly living out the Proverbs 31 identity in the cyber world as well as our living rooms.
First, let me say a quick prayer for myself before digging deep into my own heart and possibly finding things I don't want to see. YIKES!


"Jesus, pry open my heart and my eyes to what breaks You. Where in my thoughts, my heart, my relationships, my interactions on the internet and in person can there be a better reflection of You and not Britney? Show me the things I don't see, even the ugly, fleshly things. Help me recognize my short-comings and instill wisdom in me. Amen."

Now, let's do this thang.


"She is clothed in strength and dignity..."


First question: What clothes are you wearing on social media?


Is it strength and dignity? Or is it negativity, self-pity, low self-esteem, bitterness, busy-ness, unforgiveness or gossip?


Strength here is not referring to an overpowering woman. To me, it can be the strength to restrain from lashing out, strength to take pain and use it for her own betterment. Strength to use wisdom and remain in silence instead of using her words as a weapon.


Are you clothed in wisdom? Or are you clothed in pettiness?


Are you clothed in dignity?
Or are you standing there on social media, totally stripped naked of all the beautiful garments a lady in Christ would wear?


When you update the world, are you clothed in all things good; grace, mercy, love, compassion, patience, wisdom & truth?


Or are you clothed in all things fleshly?
Before word vomiting all over everyone's newsfeed, I should be asking myself:

"Are you wearing what Britney would pick out to wear today? Or are you going to let Christ lay out your wardrobe for you?"

As for me, I want to hit my knees before hitting the post button.
I guarantee once praying about whatever issue I am about to blast on social media, I will no longer feel the need to post it any longer.


Honestly, airing my dirty laundry is stinky.
It stinks and nobody wants to smell it.

 "...She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue."

Second question: What is on your tongue? 

Obviously, we are all human here.
We make mistakes.
We let our tongues flap wildly more than they should.
This is why God has laid all of this onto my heart.

What is on my tongue?
Honestly, a lot of the time things that I am not proud of.

I'll tell you something, it's not always "faithful instruction".
I'll tell you something else, I'm not always speaking with wisdom!

But, I strive to do both of these.
Especially on social media, as lately this has been my focus.

Did you know your Facebook page, your Instagram or even your twitter feed could be a testimony? 
Even a witness? 
A light? 

Your thoughts are reaching hundreds, sometimes thousands of people, ladies.

You have the opportunity to say so much to someone who is hurting, lost or just seeking someone full of hope, help and positivity with the click of a button.

Unfortunately, you also have the opportunity to destroy, to hurt, to break, to wound, to slander, to gossip...also with a click of the button.

How you use social media is in your hands and though you aren't using your actual tongue, the same principal still applies.
The tongue (in this case your fingers) has the power to destroy or to build up, to degrade or to encourage. 

Proverbs 18:21 - Death and life [are] in the power of the tongue: and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof.

So, what's on your tongue on social media?
Just because the words do not ever pass your lips, does not mean they do not have extreme power. 

Life is not always grand, but are you approaching your hurt with the Cross in mind or something else?

You do not have to pretend everything and everyone in this journey is always okay, but you do have to answer to how you reacted along the way. 

Matthew 12:36-37 

"I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”

I desire to speak with wisdom on social media. 
I desire to NOT speak with wisdom on social media if need be.

I desire to have delightful things on my tongue; faithful instruction, encouragement, hope, grace.

The tongue is a double-edged sword and I choose to lay it down and to stop using it as a weapon of destruction.

I pray that Christ is the first we approach when we have something to say, not our status'; whether that be a story of success or one of pain.

I know I have a lot of heart-searching to do and personally need to ask God where I stand with Him on social media.

I long to be the Proverbs 31 woman not just to my family, but all who are touched by the consequences of my reactions.

Lastly, replace words in verses about controlling the "tongue" or your "lips" and replace it with the word "thumb," for social media.


"When there are many words, sin is unavoidable, but he who restrains his thumbs is wise."-Proverbs 10:19

Silly exercise, but a whole lotta truth.

"Jesus, help me reflect You in every form that I may take on, in the home or on the internet. Help my ears be open to Your voice and my heart open to Your guidance. Help me be more about promoting You on social media, not promoting myself or demoting others. Amen."