Tell me I've miscalculated the years.
How are you thirteen today?
I suppose I knew it was coming sooner than later; you've been reminding me and your dad that you simply cannot order off of the child's menu anymore, even if you do eat less than your younger brothers.
Thirteen year olds are basically grown-ups, right?
You want to grow up so quickly, so I want to write you to let you know that it's okay to linger in your childhood.
It's okay to take your time to grow old.
With this letter we celebrate thirteen years of beautiful life, but with this letter I also want to remind you of so many of the things I wish I would have slowed down to hear before I grew up far too quickly.
1. Slow. Down. I know you're at the age where you want to be an adult, like yesterday. You want to drive. You want to be independent. You want to rush your childhood, racing passed it with no second thoughts. Caler,slow down. First, adulthood isn't even that fun. You want to sleep in, stay home and watch Spongebob, but you can't. You have to wear pants every single day and sticking out your tongue at jerks can get you fired. You're supposed to be "mature" and "responsible"-neither of these are fun words. Trust me, you want to listen to me on this: take your time and enjoy just being a kid. I rushed through growing up and I now long for the days of spraying canned cheese in my mouth and riding my bike until dusk.
2. Seek God above all other people. I know right now, girls are a thought, but they haven't yet taken president over video games or Saturday morning cartoons. Guess what? They will. One day, you will notice the way the sunlight makes music with a certain girl's hair instead of the score on your xbox game. It will smack you down like a ton of bricks, just like that. You will begin to spend more time ruffling gel into those curly locks of yours and try to shave hair not yet present on your upper lip. Girls are great, hey, I'm one; one day you will find a pretty amazing one (WHEN YOU'RE THIRTY). But, make sure they are not even near the top of your priority list until you find the one that God has for you (WHEN YOU'RE FORTY). God, family, yourself, your dreams, your school-these are the elements of life that should take residence in your heart until it is time to hand part of yourself over to your bride (WHEN YOU'RE FIFTY). Seek Christ above all others, all things, all dreams, all pursuits-this will lead to a joyful life, a fulfilled life, even when other partsdon't seem so great. I've made this mistake-it's not pretty. Seeking anyone but Jesus to fill you will leave you feeling so, so empty, sweet boy.
3. Do stupid stuff. Okay, I'm not your mom or dad so I can tell you stuff like this. DO STUPID STUFF. Cocaine? bad. Toilet papering houses? good. (Don't tell dad I told you that though, okay?) Of all the things that I regret from my teenage years, doing stupid stuff (not cocaine) isn't one of them. I rolled houses. I put shaving cream on people's heads at church camp. I put flour into their blow dryers (you didn't hear that from me). I danced with my best friend in my childhood bedroom to crappy pop music until 4 am. I had a lot of fun, but stayed totally sober and never once broke curfew. It's okay to have fun. It's okay to act SILLY. Being serious all the time is lame. Laugh. Laugh a lot.
4. Never stop hanging out with your parents. I failed miserably at this one and I regret it now. I currently jump on any chance I get to lay on my parent's couch, eat their food and just talk to them. You spend so much of your teenage years wishing your parent would get off your back and then find yourself at age 25 wishing they would be around to hug your neck more often. Don't miss out on hanging out with your mom or your dad right now. Believe it or not, they're actually pretty smart, and funny, and cool people to talk to. Bonus: they both love you to pieces and want the absolute best for you, so they will be even better than talking to a best friend about your troubles, because they've been where you are. They have faced the battles you will face. You know what? I bet they have some pretty swell advice to offer.
5. Be your own person. I know the next few years are vital to your reputation (P.S-this word is dumb. Nobody really cares after graduation who you are or what you did). I know right now everything about life seems uncertain; it's constantly changing and you're growing slowly into the man you will one day be. But-be your own person. You have so much to offer the world, why would you want to imitate anyone else? Your heart, your talents, your values, your dreams-those are yours and yours alone. Develop your own thoughts, for nobody can take those from you. Vote how you want to vote, think how you want to think, feel how you want to feel. I want you to believe in something because you truly believe in it, not because you were told to believe it. I want you to be your own person and to find yourself along the way through your own life experiences. Your mom, your dad, me, we can all walk alongside you, but we can't walk for you. You have to earn your own legs and learn your own path. Know that I will be there to love you, no matter what that path may look like.
Happy Birthday, kiddo.You are dearly, dearly loved by so many.
Now, blow out your candles and make a wish!
-B
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