Pretty Isn't Priority

I remember when I was younger, I had a bow to match every dress I owned and I refused to wear anything but a dress until I was in first grade.

As a little girl, you are taught to cross your legs, look straight into the camera and "smile pretty."
Our hair is pulled, prodded and twisted into absolute perfection.

We are trained to be pretty.
To look pretty.
To act pretty.


I think we grow into thinking it is our duty and our responsibility to "blossom" and to transform into delicate, fair posies.
So we grow.
We blossom.

We figure out how to tame our wild, curly locks.
We discover how to dress in the most flattering way for our own body type.
What color blush suits our fair cheeks the best.
What goopy foundation blends the best into our pores.

We pluck.
We wax.
We cut.
We highlight.
We blend.
We contour.

We do all we can to pay our dues and be the flower we were told to be.
We look into the camera.
We smile pretty.

I decided to not wear any make up this week as an experiment for the purpose of this blog. I showered, let my curls fall naturally and left the blush brushes and foundation sponges sit in their drawer. I wanted to see how I would feel, what people would say, the reactions I might get. I wanted to know why I was really doing what I was doing. Why did I feel the need to cover my natural face up? Was I doing it for me? For the people I passed in the grocery store? If I wasn't doing it for myself, I wanted to discover why I was doing it at all.

You want to know what happened the last few days when I left the house without make up or hair mousse?
Nothing. Absolutely nothing. People didn't look at me cross-eyed. My husband didn't ask if I was feeling okay. Nobody even seemed to notice, but me. Granted, I think makeup can be fun and nice to put on for work or just to make yourself feel a little bit more put together. I'm not giving up make up completely, for I don't feel the need to personally do that. Will I wear it way less often?
YOU BET! It's freeing. I feel freaking great, honestly.
I feel like Britney. Just Britney.

I don't want to wear makeup again until I forget about it all together.
I want my natural face to be more normal to me than the one with dark eyelashes and painted cheeks.
I don't want to feel I owe anyone, my own prettiness, anymore.

I want to be beautiful, not pretty.
I want to be known for my heart, not my face.
I want to know that prettiness isn't a priority in my own life.

There are far more beautiful things than looks to strive for.
There is wisdom.
There is laughter.
There is knowledge.
There is kindness.
There is humility.
There is meekness.
There is selflessness.

These are the things I want to leave with the world.

 I feel like so many of us feel like we owe the world to be pretty.
You don't owe anyone that.
Pretty isn't a priority, nor should it be.

If you want to use hair products and eye-shadow to enhance yourself some days, go for it!
But, don't use it to hide.
Don't use it because you feel you owe anyone anything.


Your job as a woman isn't to smile pretty.
Your job as a woman isn't to be anything but yourself.

You don't owe prettiness to anyone.

Be kind.
Be gentle.
Be humble.
Be merciful.

For those are the things that will outshine the wrinkles of old age.